Why I Stopped Using Instagram (And Feel Better Than Ever)

I am a creature of habit. 

We all are. Our habits define us. This person wakes up at dawn. That one swims laps every week. This guy blogs in his spare time. There’s a reason The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is one of the most famous self-improvement books ever. More and more, I’m realizing how small, consistent behaviours build up, until they become a part of us.

That isn’t always a good thing.

This person never speaks up. That one is always negative. This man avoids responsibility. That woman drinks too much, this guy burns all his money on useless junk, that kid is jerking off to porn.

I’ve talked about addictions before. I won’t bother going over the same ground here, but in essence, an addiction is a bad habit that spiralled out of control. Instead of facing our problems, we run from them, trying to escape into fast food and fantasies and anything that can light us up with another hit of dopamine – if only for the moment.

And the next moment, and the next moment, and the next. We become like dogs trying to catch their own tails, always chasing the high. Stuck in place instead of moving forwards.

Screw that. Life is short and we’re all going to die. This year, I want to become a better person. To achieve my goals and improve myself – not waste my time on things I thought I needed.

This year I’m quitting my addictions.

Today I’m talking about getting off my damn phone. 

Image credit: Engadget

One of my favorite writers, Mark Manson, recently talked about how smartphones have become the new cigarettes. They’re ubiquitous, firmly entrenched in today’s culture – you don’t have a phone? – and as is becoming increasingly clear, are bad for us in excess. It’s not our lungs being corroded, but our attention.

Technologically, we are more connected today than ever before. The internet is literally in the palm of your hand. We have endless information and entertainments available at the tap of a screen. Google, iFlix, YouTube, social media. Likes, comments, cat videos. Novelty and instant gratification. It’s a steady stream of randomized rewards that keeps us coming back for more.

The price of this is that we are permanently distracted. We can’t sit through a movie, a workout, a traffic light without pulling out our phones. I know I couldn’t. Some of that screen time was spent reading genuinely good content, but way too much of it was on social media. I never got into Facebook (probably a good thing). But for the last year or two, I’ve spent a fair part of each day posting pictures, statuses, and browsing quotes and memes on Instagram. A week ago, I got fed up and finally deleted it.

Two things happened. Number one, I panicked. It felt like I was giving up something precious, critically important. Something I needed. This is, sadly, one of the hallmarks of addiction.

For the first few days, I caught myself picking up my phone, staring at the empty space where the app used to be, and then putting it down. How often do we do this during the day without even thinking about it? Every free minute turns into a reward-seeking behaviour. It’s a sobering reminder of our animal instincts. Humans can be trained too.

And number two, I began to feel free.

Suddenly, I was more focused at work. I had more time to read, to ponder things, more time to play games. More time to write. I found myself becoming more aware of my surroundings. I was less caught up in taking perfect pictures. A drain on my attention had been removed – and my own attention-seeking behaviour reduced accordingly.

I still feel a pang at cutting myself off this way. But at the same time, I realize that I don’t need to be vicariously involved in other people’s lives. And vice versa. There are better ways to spend my time. Who else has told themselves they were only going to scroll for five minutes, and then lost half an hour or more? Do you need that kind of time-sink in your life? 

Because we don't. We want it; the likes, the upvotes, the notifications. We want the external validation, fame and the approval of others. But want and need are two different things.

Of course, it’s not just social media.

The internet has connected us like never before. But it’s also opened a Pandora’s Box of entertaining distractions, to say nothing of the effects on outrage and extremism. Humanity is still learning how to cope. I know I am. 

I also know that we only get one life, and one world that matters. The real world. Not one seen through a screen. So how about looking up from yours?

I’m about to do just that.